Hypersonic Plumbing

noun: the waterworks of a toilet system in which the water and waste move at speeds in excess of Mach 5 (five times the speed of sound, or about 3800 mph).

When I first read this phrase on a friend's notebook, I thought it was a fantastic idea. Our teacher had been talking about hypersonic flow, and then had moved on to plumbing. By combining these, had he created one of the next great engineering breakthroughs, or an all-conquering ball-sucking aquatic demon of terror?

Don't flush while you sit.

I think I'm siding with "horrific instrument of torture."

Facial Debris

Noun: the remains of a face that has been destroyed.

My roommate came to visit at the end of summer, and we played quite a lot of the game Skate. In this game, you wipe out. A lot. After a particularly nasty fall on a half-pipe, he said something along the lines of "There's facial debris all over that ramp now."


And thus, the first Two Bad Words were born, and with it, the idea for this blog.

Later that week, we were still discussing this phrase, because it was so violent, and stuck with us so well. I brought up that it's such a bad phrase, there is no possible way it could ever be used with a positive connotation. To which he responded, "No, I can think of one. 'Good news! We found your facial debris!'"

Touché.

What's it all about?

Two wrongs don't make a right. Two rights don't make a left. Two lefts don't make a wrong.

Sometimes the whole is greater than the sum of its parts, like with a plane. Try flying a tube without wings or engines. It doesn't work.

Here's an example: macaroni and cheese. Macaroni: good. Cheese: good. So macaroni and cheese should be good x2 (great), right? You'd think. But it's at least good x10 (amazing), depending on many variables.

We'll get into that some other time.

What we're doing here is exactly the opposite. Take two words that by themselves are fine, add them together, and it somehow becomes one of the worst things in the world.

It's like that.

We'll start with these Two Bad Words, give a definition, and how it was derived. It should be humorous, like your arm.